DID YOU KNOW: WHEN U KNOCK ON SOMEONE’S BEDROOM DOOR UR NOT SUPPOSED TO OPEN THE DOOR RIGHT AFTER U KNOCK WHAT KIND OF WARNING IS THAT IF IM IN THE NUDE IM NOT GIONG TO BE ABLE TO PUT CLOTHES ON IN 0.2 SECONDS U PIECE OF SHIT WAIT UNTIL I SAY U CAN COME IN
My dad has 84 pairs of socks
why did you count the amount of pairs of socks that your dad has
I didn’t count, he did, then he came downstairs and announced it to the entire family
Did you know that Crush is portrayed “high” because Sea Turtles actually eat jellyfish and the poisons inside the jelly doesn’t actually harm the turtle but instead intoxicates them much like marijuana does for humans.
i just thought it was because he was supposed to be a “surfer dude”
My dad just yelled “I SWEAR I’LL CUT OFF WHAT’S LEFT OF YOUR DICK IF YOU FUCKING TOUCH MY COKE DON’T YOU DARE” and I came in the room like what the fuck and it was my dad holding up a shoe and my cat sitting by a glass of coca-cola with his paw almost touching inside of it and both of them didn’t even break eye contact with each other
So i have this giant pencil right
I think we all know where this is going.
the amount of people saying that they were expecting me to shove it up my ass is alarming
Yes, it does.
Guys get morning wood because our bladders fill up during the night and begin to press against our prostate, causing arousal. Our dicks don’t just feel the sun coming up and think “My time has come”
"My time has come" whispered the penis as the sun slowly rose in the east.
I will never look at morning wood the same way ever again.